AND WHY IS THERE CAT FUR ALL OVER THE FLOORS?!

AND WHY ARE THERE HATS EVERYWHERE?!

AND WHO SPILLED THESE MARBLES ALL OVER THE KITCHEN??!??!??!?!?*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

AND MY PARENTS ARE HERE ALREADY!!!!

DOUBLE AAAAAAAAAAAAH! :) Bye.

*There aren't really marbles all over the kitchen. Rest is true.

I really had thought that my video from earlier today was going to be my last one with the same hair and same glasses that I have this very moment, but nooooooo. Avi had to incense me by telling me he still hadn't watched the movie I sent him (from the heart) so I couldn't wait, needed to call him out on it, and boy did I ever:

Did I forget to warn you that I swear a lot in that? Oh. I swear a lot in that. :)

Stop driving it up and down the street. If you do not stop I will come outside with a dozen eggs and throw them at you as you pass by.

FUCKING A, I MEAN IT.

Kisses,
~Poppy

Last night's Office was a bit weak. Avi and I agree John Krasinski looked tired. Molly and I agree we're so over Jam it's not funny. Hay and I loved Angela's story line the best. The little mini orgasms she kept having over everyone's recounts were hilarious. And when Creed didn't play along nicely was the best. Both Hay and I had to look away when we saw Ryan and Kelly making out. GET. A. ROOM. :) Anyone else want to chime in on the supersized episode?

Hay and I are going directly from work to see GRINDHOUSE and I cannot wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We were also supposed to go to see the in-laws this weekend but that fell through due to weather so I'll be home on either my living room or office couch feverishly working away on some projects for work that are never going to get done during the work week. Yay, me. At least I have some Lindt wafer milk chocolate bars to help me out with that.

New, supersized episode of The Office this Thursday!!!!! It starts at 8pm, so ADJUST YOUR TIMERS, YO.

I am so jealous because Avi is seeing this RIGHT NOW, but Hay and I are going to see Grindhouse this Friday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!! I'm sure Avi will ruin it for us all in the comments, so visit cautiously. ;) And, in case you need a reminder, here's the preview:

This morning's song was from a local artist, the brother of one of my best guy friend's wife, an artist I've known since I was probably 11 which was before it was even a thought in his mind that he would be a musician. I hardly ever think of him, but this morning he's the one I thought of. Or, rather, his song is.

While in the shower I was trying to get the notes right for one of the verses and then all of a sudden a story from my past consumed my brain. Picture three years ago when you didn't even know me. I had been asked by the local artist's sister to go to his show at a martini bar in town. I convinced Hay to go with me and we went to meet up with Guy Friend and a bunch of locals who all knew us and the artist.

I promise you this story gets interesting.

When Hay and I arrived we found Guy Friend and went to the bartender to order drinks. At the suggestion of GF I ordered a chocotini while he ordered an appletini. Hay ordered juice because he is über responsible and doesn't actually drink. After we had drinks in hand we sat down at a table and watched Artist set up his stage and talked with a bunch of the others in the room we knew, including a former bandmate who came to support Artist by bringing his girlfriend and their tiny shaking chihuahua who they sprayed with perfume so that the dog didn't smell like a dog. (I know.)

It was this night that I realized I don't like chocotinis so I had about three sips of my drink, but no more alcohol than that. Remember this for later. Sober Poppy. Semi-important detail.

The story is about to get interesting. And it's even a true story. No lies.

Just as Artist was ready to perform the door to the club swung open and in walks this guy. This annoying gnat. This bane of my existence. I had never actually met him before, but the first thing he did when he walked in the door was ask everyone for (free, no less) drugs and then "WOO!" really REALLY loudly. Artist was instantly thrown off his game by this guy who "WOO!"ed through every song, and clapped really loudly and said "YAAAAAAH!" after each one.

Everyone was murmuring about this kid under their breath, but I? I was getting pretty fucking PISSED OFF. Four songs later and Artist finishes while the kid is still "WOOOOOO!"ing and "YAAAAAAAH!"ing. I could not take it anymore, so when silence hit the room I looked this kid directly in the eye and said "DUDE! SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Artist looks at me nervously, but I'm too busy staring down the kid. Kid approaches me with "I'm gonna fuck you up, lady" eyes while I stare right back with "Try it, motherfucker, I'll take you down so hard you won't wake up from it." No one said anything. Hay and Guy Friend just sat there in disbelief, not really understanding what their role in this situation was supposed to be, so they froze and held their breath and hoped they were invisible. The kid registered my icy stare somewhere in his methed out brain, "WOO"ed one more time, then left the building.

A bunch of the crowd came up to thank me for doing that, but not The Artist. He just went on with the show, and we had a great time. During the very last song the kid walked back in and I was ready to kick some ass, but that's not what the kid was there for. He went to the front of the stage, sat on the floor, put his hands in his lap, and just listened. No WOO!, no YAH!, nothing. When Artist was finished the kid walked back out the door and I never saw him again.

The story has concluded its interestingness.

And that's my morning so far today, how my entire day can be influenced by the stream of consciousness of my mind. I am ready to kick some ass today. Good thing it's finally time for self defense class. :)

Anyway, just LOOK:

From I is gots your tail (ICHC?). I can't stand it. I can't! I CAN'T!

Also, things are growing at my house! Woohoo! And the sun is out! Double-woohoo! Sooooo, I made a bit of an early Sunday Garden Party set. My favorite part of the set is my own feet, despite my dislike for feet. Here are the feet photos:

I still need to read World War Z (ACW, please don't uninvite me over!*) but I am instead choosing to read Crimson Joy because I read the first paragraph and was hooked (Avi gets the credit for this).

I tried the Starbucks doubleshot espresso & cream. I think my brain and heart simultaneously exploded with the first mouthful. Hay is picking me up a decaf iced mocha on his way back from Home Depot when I go take Ripley to the groomer's a little later today. I can handle those, I'm not sure I can keep handling the doubleshots without keeling over.

Hay and I have been invited to two weddings! One is in June, locally, and involves the person that B and I refer to as "the bird lady". I'll be going out of politesse. Hay may or may not go, and I don't much care which way he sides. The other wedding we were invited to is in July and is for my cousin who is in the process of getting her PhD so that she can be a prominent women's health expert. For reasons I cannot go into, I am confident that she will do very well in this job, and am happy she will further her career despite the fact that she is marrying an older man (whom she loves very much) with gobs of money. This wedding will be in Maryland, so guess what my big plans are? *TO VISIT ACW. YAR. I'M GONNA MEET THE LEGEND, HIS LOVELY WIFE, AND HIS AWESOME KITTIES. WHO'S EXCITED? WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!! Yes, he knows this already. Yes, he is willingly meeting me. Yes, I will be taking photos of his feet and cats.