Ohhhhhhh my goodness, I am so voraciously hungry right not, probably not the best time to write up this post. But! I must show the inequities of it all…
Here is an innocent box of Stop & Shop Italian style mozzarella sticks:
And here is the servings information showing 4.5 servings of 3 sticks per box (4.5 * 3 = 13.5 sticks), included with the nutrition information:
And here are the entire contents of the box:
1 * 3, 2 * 3, 3 * 3, … and 2 more. 11 sticks. 3 and 2/3 servings.
I attempted to weigh the contents of the box to see if it was the servings information that was wrong or if we got short changed on mozzies, but I had already placed them on the cookie sheet so when I weighed myself I was horrified at the number on the scale and went scurrying off to drown my sorrows in the entire box of mozzies. Either way, I want to point out:
STOP & SHOP IS LYING TO US.
I would like a free box of mozzies now, please. Thanks.
You know what I'm talking about… It's that span of time during which you are promised a representative from a company will show up to your house to install, repair, remove, or troubleshoot something. You take time you don't have off from work to sit at home and hope someone shows up during "the window". If they do show up it's almost always at the tail end of the window, or some uncomfortable amount of time past the end of the window, so you still spend a bunch of time being sure they wouldn't show. If they don't you pound your fist in the air and yell, "I told you so!" to no one in particular.
And even if we work in a job where we are one of The Window People, we all know more often than not we personally have wasted a lot of time waiting for people who never show up, juuuust like being stood up for a date or waiting for a phone call that never actually happens.
It is not good customer service. It should be banned. It's a lose-lose.
This post was inspired by Jen. If you don't read Jen then you don't like space. If you don't like space then … um, what's wrong with you?
On the way to work my lung came out my mouth from coughing and just as I turned (rises in the east, sets in the west) East and the sun was in my eyes I sneezed my brain out through both nostrils.
Last night I kept inexplicably having feelings like I was going to have an anxiety attack but never had one. I kept trying to justify that feeling, giving it plenty of potential reasons, but today I'm absolutely certain it was just the cold because my stomach started randomly aching in exactly the same way my chest had last night.
Oh, and I had a piercing headache when I woke up.
And Dawg told me this morning he has the sniffles. Awww, our first official cold together. I love this cold!
I feel like I have a cold. I'm amused that this cold has decided to visit me at the end of my vacation. Do you think work will believe me if I say "hi, I'm in Tennessee but I need to take a sick day"? Yah, no, me either.
Georgie got dipping sauce on her tail tonight/last night/three years ago (depending when you read this).
Happens.
Yes, my pager kept going off. Apparently we're in another hot time for low-profile threats due to MEDIA ATTENTION. Fuckin' media. I had four separate reports to my pager today/yesterday/three years ago (depending when you read this), when on a typical day I get zero. Someone got out of jail or started a new war, methinks.
I am entertained by the stories being told in my comments. Please tell me a gross furry kid, human kid, or other human story in my comments. I enjoy feeling green.
This advertisement (which I refuse to show here) compares smoking to terrorism, and uses the imagery of the WTC on 9/11 in cigarette form.
I realize that marketing school is turning out those fancy edge-pusher graduates who think that shock value is the only way to get a message across, but that is going way too far.
And I'm not using caps or italics or bold or extra vowels to state that, but there is rage brewing inside of me. And I'm not going to stoop to their level by suggesting, "when your parents die in a fiery car crash please send me images of their dead bodies so I can post them on my blog and advise people to fly to their destination via [insert my favorite airline here] instead" … but I kinda wanna.
