This is NYCWD. Poppy is not here today, so I am guest posting on her blog. Her absence is not because she was deeply hurt by the lack of appreciation she was shown while trying to demonstrate the bubbles from Saturday via video in yesterday’s post that was requested by you, her friends. No, that has nothing to do with it whatsoever.
/sarcasm
- Image by Chaddycakes via Flickr
I have had a long relationship with 1-800-FLOWERS. I’ve used them for years to send flowers and things to people out of state, and with the eventual collapse of the local florist industry for people in the city as well. I spend, on average (between birthdays, special occasions, and of course Valentine’s Day) around $1,000 a year. I also have some purchasing power in my job that gives them an additional $2,000-$4,000 worth of business.
I am used to their fuck ups. No, really. I expect them to be somewhat delayed during the big holidays of Valentine’s Day and Mother’s Day. This is why I try to get things delivered a little early during these holidays. I even pay a little extra for it. This year’s service however has insured I will never use 1-800-FLOWERS again for anything!
On February 11 I ordered a dozen red roses to be delivered to Poppy’s place of business. I put all the actual specifics into the order form for business deliveries and set the date for February 13. Sadly, Poppy did not receive her flowers by 5:00pm on February 13. A call to 1-800-FLOWERS customer service gave the regular explanation of high volume, traffic, busy day, blah, blah, blah. I accepted this. I just asked that the flowers be delivered before noon on Monday February 16.
I am a loving and considerate consumer.
Monday I got an e-mail confirmation at 11:54am that the flowers had been delivered. I called Poppy and asked how her flowers were. She was getting Subway (yum) and would let me know when she got back to the office.
She called me about 20 minutes later and guess what? No flowers. So I called 1-800-FLOWERS again. The customer service was apologetic and whatnot and tried calling the florist… but after 20 minutes of trying and getting voicemail it was determined they were out to lunch. They had the signer of the flowers on their system as being “Y“. Yes… the signer was the Letter Y. I expressed this was unacceptable. They agreed and sent a message to the actual florist. I told them I wanted resolution today… and they said they would call me back.
They never called me back. However, Sam the florist called Poppy at 4:45pm and laid a guilt trip on her for working a 9-5 job because he wanted to send the flowers out that day.
Sam upset the Poppy.
The Poppy called the Dawggy.
The Dawggy called Sam.
Sam is obviously a fucking moron. He tried putting the blame of the false confirmation elsewhere stating he was the “third party”. He did not understand that the confirmation he had 1-800-FLOWERS send was fraud, that he was responsible for this fuck up, or that he needed to resolve it without being a nasty fuck. He continued to insist he was just the “third party”. I then reminded him that he was the “third party” since fucking Friday, and therefore my “first party” will be coming to his “third party” place of business, that I got from a reverse phone look-up, for a “blanket party” if things were not rectified.
Sam understood this last portion of the conversation.
Poppy got her flowers yesterday.
1-800-FLOWERS lost at least $3,000 worth of business over this debacle simply because they failed to follow up with their promise to call me back and instead expected their Brooklyn fraudulent confirming delivery florist to do the right thing.
:)
When that happens I take nighttime showers.
