Poppy Cedes

Today I am thankful for having the courage to step completely outside my comfort zone, what was easy for me, and go for what I actually wanted. And I am thankful most of all for the results:

A man I adore who enjoys coming home to me every night.
Three beautiful kitties who love the sounds of the city, the large window sills, and cuddling up to their parents.
A fantastically charming and cozy apartment that is just the right size so we can’t overfill it with packrat crap.
A new city that embraces me just the way I am, no matter how I choose to be.
A new job that challenges me every day but lets me teach them a thing or two.
The subway — both the good and the bad of it.
My insurance agent. (what? she’s awesome!)
Friends who are far away but still care about me.
Family members who are far away but still love me unconditionally.
That rut in the street on W 55 between Broadway and 8 Ave that I am always stumbling over, which reminds me to look down, pay attention, live in the moment, and appreciate my life.
Those who touched my life and are now gone but never forgotten.

I am thankful for so much more, but those are a few things…

Have a safe and happy holiday if you’re celebrating. Have a safe and happy Thursday if you’re not.

I write the dorkiest titles sometimes. What do you expect? I’ve been blogging since January 6, 2005. I’m old. I’m a dork. bah.

Yesterday at work I figured out another Mac problem. I feel really bad for The Official Mac Guy who isn’t solving these problems on his own and I have to keep reminding him of all the steps we have figured out. This time I saved him hours of time after he did something he didn’t need to do which resulted in ALL the user accounts being locked out, including root, on the laptop of one of the reps. That ain’t good. But, worked my magic and we were back in within 15 minutes. And, then, of course, my project continued to be the biggest pain in the ass there is to be, but a lovable one. I was on hold with tech support for the server software for over an hour so while I was on the “your call is very important to us!” marathon hold I used my BlackBerry to make another phone call to another business about another matter, because there really isn’t any time for me to just sit around waiting for things at this job. I am lucky to have mastered the multi-tasking skill early in my career.

Daring to sit between two homeless people on the subway meant I got a seat on the E train on the way home last night! The train was waiting for me when I got into the tunnel so I hopped on before the doors closed. I was all ready to do some pole dancing (since there are never any seats) but a homeless man was sprawled out on one of the seat rows then his buddy was sitting at the other end — just enough room for Poppy to sit in between with 4″ clearance on either side. w00t!

I keep meaning to mention this but then I forget. Don’t take this the wrong way, ok? Ok! Here we go…

A tip to tourists: Please don’t ride the subway during rush hour if you can avoid it. I guesstimate rush hour to be 7:00am-9:45am and 4:00pm-6:45pm Monday through Friday. If you have to ride during rush hour then keep it to yourself that you’re a tourist. We really don’t want to hear about how you have the day off to do tourist stuff while we’re rushing to work for a long day or rushing home after a long day. We appreciate your tourist dollars, we just don’t appreciate that you get the day off when we don’t or that you do so much effing talking. Be quiet and listen to your iPod like the rest of us. Oh, and we also don’t appreciate when you squeal with scared glee every time the train does something you don’t expect it to, like stopping and starting. Thank you for your cooperation.

A nicer tip for tourists: If a train barrels into the station sounding its horn that means it’s not in service so don’t bother preparing yourself to board that train. And don’t freak out when it drives right by, there will be another one coming relatively soon. At least until the MTA cuts the number of trains and we all have to wait half an hour for a train that arrives already packed like sardines so we don’t even get in the doors. (heh.)

I now have 13 sweaters, 8 button-down shirts, 4 long-sleeve shirts, 8 pairs of dress pants, three belts, and three pairs of shoes. I can’t really tell if that’s a lot or not, but it keeps me from feeling like I’m wearing the same combinations every week. Score one for the Popstar!

Today is another special birthday: My stepdad is a year older today! My stepdad is one of my favoritest people not related to me by blood on the planet. He is awesomeness squared then put into a box tied with a bow and handed to me to open. He gives great advice, great hugs, great life lessons, and great food. He has a heart of gold, and I love him a lot. Happy birthday, M!!!!! Your present will arrive with us when WE SEE YOU IN TENNESSEE NEXT FRIDAY!

(Aside form the love part, I suddenly feel like a game show announcer. AND A NEW CAR! AND A HOT TUB! AND A TRIP TO BRAZIL AND BERMUDA!)

Saturday I squeaked under the wire to arrive at the post office about 5 minutes before they closed and picked up my package waiting for me there:

PURTY. I am loving it. Close-up surface photos of the planet. And luckily the 3D glasses actually work for me. When I was a kid I couldn’t see in 3D because, I’m guessing, I had an astigmatism back then and it prevented me from being able to see anything but a flat image in blue and red. Now I have glasses that correct my astigmatism and see an image popping out at me, a much better result.

Speaking of packages, I think it was Bill O’Reilly on the TV who was saying “package” and “big package” and “stimulus package” and now I’m all turned on by all the package talk. What can I say…

CUTE ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today is my mommy’s birthday. I have her present here at my home because I’m bringing it to her on Friday when Dawg and I go to Tennessee!!!!!! YIPPY!!!!! Happy birthday, Mom!!!!!!! :pinkpuffyheart:

I was on the subway Thursday innocently listening to my iPod when a Stuff You Should Know podcast began playing titled “How Cannibalism Works“.

The description of the podcast:

“Cannibalism is one of humanity’s near-universal taboos, but it has been practiced in widely varying circumstances throughout history. Check out this HowStuffWorks podcast to learn the difference between the three types of cannibalism.”

In this podcast they describe the three types of cannibalism which I will now do for you as well:

Survival cannibalism is the act of person(s) eating other person(s) to survive. Those people they feed upon can be dead from natural or untimely causes (including murder by others than those involved in the act of cannibalism), by murder at the hands of the cannibal, or by suicide at the hands of the person being consumed.

Learned cannibalism is passed down from generation to generation and is broken up into two categories:
Endocannibalism: Eating members of your tribe or family. This is most often done to honor the dead person or to capture some characteristic the person possessed in life. It, obviously, can be done for more nefarious reasons.

Exocannibalism: Eating members outside of your tribe or family. This is generally done with the nefarious intent of scaring a group of people, stealing a person’s life force, or just for shits and giggles (as in, “I’m hungry, I think I’ll eat that guy!”).

Autocannibalism is the term applied to a person who eats his or her own flesh. This practice is not very common in everyday life, it is more a mechanism of torture or war crime, or can refer back to survival cannibalism where it is necessary to eat a portion of yourself to stay alive.

The one thing the How Stuff Works podcasters couldn’t find were laws specifically outlawing cannibalism on the books. There were references to it being illegal, but the podcasters concluded that the reason there were no laws on the books was because the topic was so taboo, so heinous, that we don’t actually need to have laws banning cannibalism.

What ass backwards thinking. If there is an action that is deemed punishable by society’s standards for healthy and harmonious living we cannot assume that there are some actions so absolutely horrible that no law needs to be made against it. I personally wouldn’t torture anybody, but I’m very glad there are rules on the book about it. I personally wouldn’t forcibly rape anybody, but I’m very glad there are rules on the book about it. I personally wouldn’t stalk someone, but I’m very glad there are rules on the book about it.

But, if given the “right” circumstances, I probably would resort to survival cannibalism or autocannibalism. Books or not, if I am in a self preservation circumstance then Meat is Meat and I’m gonna eat it to stay alive. If that means I’m going to jail, so be it.

I did a bit of googling and found no specific reference that cannibalism itself is specifically illegal, but the act committed prior to eating the flesh is:

IC 35-45-11-2
Abuse of corpse
35-45-11-2 Sec. 2. A person who knowingly or intentionally:
(1) mutilates a corpse;
(2) has sexual intercourse or sexual deviate conduct with the corpse; or
(3) opens a casket with the intent to commit an act described in subdivision (1) or (2);
commits abuse of a corpse, a Class D felony.
As added by P.L.249-1993, SEC.1. Amended by P.L.52-1997, SEC.56.
Sources: http://www.in.gov/legislative/ic/code/title35/ar45/ch11.html

In order to eat a person’s flesh you kind of need to filet or somehow tear them up a bit, thus mutilating. So… what happens if your BFF filets someone and you just eat the flesh? Just the butcher goes down but you’re in the clear? Sticky situation, that.

You can find out waaaaaay more about the hows, whys, and whats of cannibalism at HowStuffWorks.com. Enjoy!

Have you ever thought about how, from our perspective, the world is moving so fast that we don’t really have the time to dwell on the past, so as soon as news is 5 minutes old we’re not supposed to really think about it anymore?

But, have you also taken the time to ponder that a piece of news could be very old but if you’re hearing it for the first time it’s fresh and brand new to you so all the emotions that others have had the time to process are now a fresh wound for you?

Paul Newman has been dead for, what, a few months now? (Actually, a month and a half.) And I’m sure there’s somebody out there who knows who Paul Newman is, cares a mild to moderate amount about him, and would be devastated by this piece of information if they visited my blog and read it.

Unabashedly without segue…

Wednesday morning Dawg dropped me off at the 71 Ave subway stop because he is nice and loves me a lot (nope, more than that) and this kind gesture was promptly rewarded by me getting on the F train instead of the E train. I ended up at 21 Queensbridge. Let’s take a look at where that is on the map:

I got on the F train at the brown circle by mistake, but should have got on the E. I noticed my mistake when my brain finally flipped on and realized E trains only have row seats, not side-by-sides. I rode all the way to Roosevelt (the purple circle) then almost got off to transfer to the correct train but thought I’d stay on for one more stop because Roosevelt is such a pain in the ass with crowdedness. And now we’ve learned our lesson that it’s because Roosevelt is a hub before the trains all split off. I suddenly found myself — surprise!!! — splitting off (the red circle) and ending up at 21 Queensbridge where I hopped off the F to get my bearings. I took the Mount Sainai pocket subway map that Dawg lovingly gave me out of my pocket and studied the options. And all by myself I figured out that I needed to take F to Lexington/W 63 Street, go street-level and walk to W 60 St and re-enter the subway, then ride the 6 train to Lexington/W 53 so I could transfer to the E train and ride it the rest of the way to 7 Ave — greeeeeeeen circles. I was so proud of myself that I figured that out all by myself and was only 10 minutes late to work… or, rather, the first person there. HA.

While I was transferring from the F to the 6 I read an email from the director asking me to fix something on some laptops. I didn’t know the history of the problem so I troubleshot it the way I knew how… and “accidentally” resolved a problem that has been plaguing my company for months, was going to cost them thousands of dollars, countless tech hours, and lots of headaches for our employees. All that is gone now, because I did things The Poppy Way. I will definitely be reminding my boss about this come raise time. He also gave me full responsibility in a project I’ve been spearheading but felt stifled by my need to ask permission for everything I was doing. So… a very good day.

After work I met Dawg at europa cafe for a quick bite before he had to go work an event. I miss him a lot lately, and I’m really excited by the chance to meet up with him in Manhattan on the days we can’t spend our evenings together. I had more to say on this subject but it all came out sappy so I’ll spare you the details. Let’s just say: I love Dawg — a lot — and a bunch of people at the corner of Broadway and W 53 St got to witness that.

So, I still ride the E train.

Today I looked out the window and saw that someone had placed an orange Post-It note on it so that it flapped in the wind while we rode. I watched it and smiled and giggled and thought about the lead-up to that Post-It’s placement.

Unfortunately, some crazy man at least twice my height (ok, not really) was swinging his entire body and his hard hat around the train so I had to move or be hit, and lost sight of the Post-It. And then got whacked in the back with a backpack and then got a seat but got sat on by a couple of 11-year-olds who probably stick their tongues on each other in inappropriate places. So, really, the Post-It was the best part of the trip. Lots of driving way too fast for the track then stopping short due to “congestion” from other trains. I did make it home in one piece, so that’s a plus!

Oh, and the news is reminding me that there is a proposal to cover budget gap and repairs by hiking the $2 subway fare 25-30% and cutting back on service by eliminating the W and Z lines, cutting back on G and M, then taking away a bunch of weekend trains. One of the newscasters jokingly recommended having tourists pay for the hike instead. Cuz, ya know, they are visiting and they expect NYC to be fucking expensive so let’s stick it to ‘em. Sounds good, actually. I spend $4/day on the subway right now. * 50 weeks * 5 days = $1000. Soooooo, they want me to pay $1250-$1300 a year. Sooooooooooooo, they can suck their own joystick. Win-win!

If you would like a Poppy Dawg Family Holiday card please contact The Man. Thank you.

Got my shoes:

No, those shoes won’t see the light of day. In fact, they’ll pretty much just see sheets on a bed and Dawg‘s head… maybe his back if he’s lucky.

I ordered a bunch of sweaters from Victoria’s Secret. Who knew they carried stuff that doesn’t pop my boobs into the faces of innocent passersby?! Well, actually, the sweaters haven’t arrived yet so I’m not sure of that.

Dawg told me he wants a robe for Christmas. I think that’s a trick. I’m going to secretly buy him a Star Wars space camp vacation where he can fulfill his wildest Leia dreams…

Oh, wait, he got that for Halloween. Damn. A robe it is.

Stolen from Avi who stole it from a meme stealing site. I like to steal. I should have mentioned that yesterday.

1. Do you like blue cheese salad dressing?
It’s my favorite.

2. Favorite late night snack?
Popcorn with butter and a little salt

3. Do you own a gun?
Nope

4. What’s your favorite drink at Starbucks or other specialty coffee shop?
Iced mocha with whipped cream

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
Not generally, although it depends on the appointment. If I know a needle will be involved then that won’t be the day you want to take a baseline blood pressure for me.

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
This is a trick question.

7. Favorite Christmas song?
Istanbul, Not Constantinople

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Coffee

9. Can you do push-ups?
I don’t care.

10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry?
Nothing. I don’t have any jewelry.

11. Favorite hobby?
Watching movies and cooking are tied.

12. Do you have A.D.D.?
Occasionally.

13. What’s one trait that you hate about yourself?
I let people walk all over me for a little while and then get mad at them about it instead of not letting them walk all over me in the first place.

14. The last disease you contracted?
Love.

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment.
Memes are so fucking bossy sometimes. Really.

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink?
Water, Coke, coffee

17. Current worry right now?
Anything I am worried about is private and not fodder for a freaking meme. Gah!
(Irony: I choose to do the memes. I know, I just like arguing with memes.)

18. Current hate right now?
We won’t go into that. It won’t end well if I do.

19. Favorite place to be?
I answered this yesterday.

20. How did you ring in the New Year?
Being sad and lonely and depressed and wishing I’d had some Kevlar.

21. Like to travel?
Love to travel, for pleasure only.

23. Do you own slippers?
They’re on my feet right now, so hopefully I do own them.

24. What color shirt are you wearing?
Grey. I’ve been wearing it since Friday night. I’m Klassy.

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?
Not really – too slippery.
(Agreed.)

26. Can you whistle?
Yes. It drives Ripley insane.

27. Favorite singer/band?
This question irritates me. Who’s your favorite child?

28. Could you ever make it 39 days on the show Survivor?
No. But if it wasn’t a show and all those pesky retards weren’t there with me I’d make it just fine.

29. What songs do you sing in the shower?
Whatever is my soundtrack for the day.

30. Favorite girl’s names?
Uh. Stefanie?

31. Favorite boy’s name?
This is definitely a trick question.

32. What’s in your pocket right now?
Kryptonite.

33. Last thing that made you laugh?
I laugh about 14 billion times a day. Who knows.

34. Like your job?
Yes

36. Do you love where you live?
Yes

37. How many TVs do you have in your house?
One

38. Who is your loudest friend?
Everyone’s louder than I am, so… yah.

39. Do you drive the speed limit or speed?
I see the speed limit as a minimum.
(That’s what my mommy taught me! :)

40. Does someone have a crush on you?
Lots of people do. I’m pretty fucking awesome.
(That’s Adam’s answer, but I’m not going to pretend it’s not true for me too.)

41. What is your favorite book?
Your mama.

42. What is your favorite candy?
Fifth Avenue and its similar counterparts

43. Favorite Sports Team?
Baseball: Red Sox, Football: New England Patriots, Basketball: Celtics
I don’t watch sports, but I’m legally obligated to adore these teams.

44. What were you doing 12 AM last night?
Watching the end of a “MADE” episode about girls competing to become models.

45. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up today?
How does Georgie pierce her voice through my earplugs every day?

Note to world: Quantum of Solace is not worth seeing in the theater. Simply Fondue is worth eating at, if you have 3 hours to spend at the restaurant.

…I am a Talking Heads/David Byrne freak.
…if an 80s song comes on the radio I will sing all the lyrics because back then I memorized every word to every song.
…I do understand that love does not heal all wounds, more so now than ever.
…being wounded is part of living.
…when I am hungry I hulk out.
…the reason I had surgery when I was 19 has more to do with me being crazy than there having been anything physically wrong with me. (I’ve never told anyone the real reason, not even the doctors.)
…the kindest thing my ex ever did for me was be there during the surgery ten years later when we thought I had a bad ovary, but it just turned out to be irritating scar tissue from the first surgery.
…it’s very clear to me from my last email exchange with my ex that I make very bad choices sometimes, despite having good intentions.
…I am more insecure than I realized, but more able to cope with my insecurities than I once was.
…it amuses me to find patches of my girls’ fur on the floor.
…I fiercely enjoy my freedom but I also love to be taken care of.
…I sometimes look out the window at the neighbor’s television when it’s dark out.
…the holidays are not enjoyable for me anymore. They hurt. A lot.
…I don’t regret the decisions I’ve made in the past year and a half, but I remain conflicted about how my decisions have impacted others.
…there is nowhere else I’d rather be than tightly gripped in my man’s arms while he sleeps.
…despite its frequent stops for “no reason” I secretly still love the E train.
…I feel more secure safety-wise now that I live in New York City than I ever did in Vermont.
…when I am angry, mad, or upset I often won’t say anything with my mouth but my face reveals all.
…I wear my glasses in the shower.
…because of negative past experiences I try to stay away from hard topics at home, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think about them.
…it’s much more comforting to me to be surrounded by a messy home than a clean one.
…my new pair of boots, without any inserts, make my back feel fantastic.
…the nightmare that plagued me for years as a kid came true for someone else I love dearly. I have no idea what to make of that.
…there are things on my mind I will never write down and never initiate discussion of because I know one day they’ll all come up naturally.
…I am the motherfucking princess.

Shamelessly stolen from several people.

Also, yesterday while Dawg was sleeping I started preparing the kitchen so that I could make crockpot meatloaf. While putting some previously meat-filled bags into the trash I squished the garbage down with my right hand and caught my knuckle on one of the Fancy Feast wet cat food lids. The gash to my knuckle was significant and I instantly started bleeding profusely. I stuck my hand under running water while I grabbed a paper towel to put pressure on the knuckle. When I finally wrapped the knuckle and turned off the water I stood in place a minute, shifting the paper towel after my blood soaked through each spot. I started to panic that I was going to need stitches, and that the sight of my own blood or my low iron count would cause me to faint. I sprinted into the bedroom and shook Dawg until he roused. “Baby, I just sliced my finger open and I want to know what to do about it.” His eyes fluttered open. “Hmm?” I explained again and showed him the finger then asked, “should I just put a band-aid on it?” to which he responded, “yes, band-aid to keep the germies out. *SNOOOOOOOOOORE*” so I went to the bathroom and quickly rewashed the finger, put Neosporin on then put a Band-Aid on. The blood kept gushing through for a little bit so I kept my finger under running water. Finally it stopped bleeding and I went on to make my meatloaf. Later on when Dawg was awake I showed him the bloody paper towel. He had no recollection of our conversation from before. I told him “I figured if my finger looked bad enough you would have woken up, and if it didn’t you would’ve gone back to sleep. You went back to sleep so I knew it would be ok.”

Poppy Logic, folks.

My BlackBerry that work gave me is too big for most of the pockets of my dress pants and jeans. This results in me putting the phone in my jacket pocket or in the back pocket of the pants that have pockets, or just setting it down places and hopefully remembering to pick it up. You know how this is going to end. Not sure how soon, but I’m gonna lose it.

I stole this from HoosierGirl who’s gone offline for a while but I didn’t notice until now, cuz… well, it’s taken me this long to finally start catching up on my Favorites folder, let alone all the other blogs I read. (She’s in my Favorites folder.)

What Your Cute Monster Says About You

You are a very natural, real person. You’re comfortable with who you are – and your spirit truly shines through. You are free of inhibitions and hang ups. Because of this freedom, you tend to be very creative. Your inner demon is greed. You can’t help but lust after wealth and shiny objects. People think you’re cute because you are so lively. Your natural glow makes you charming. The Cute Monster Test

I am not greedy for wealth or shiny objects. I really am not, ask anyone close to me. I am greedy for other things, but not tangibles. If it said I was greedy for time with my loved ones I’d agree with that statement. The reason I chose that monster is because she’s adorable, has that thing over her head, and my “favorite color” is green. (It’s sometimes blue or black or red, but historically it is green.)

I showed this to Dawg and he called me his little monster.