So, how ya doin’? Me, yup, I’m good. Yup, yup. So, what’s new with you?
If it wasn’t clear from my Poppable, there’s a snow storm here today. I saw three accidents and heard several sirens on the way into work. I almost kicked the fucking ass of a guy who decided to tail me into the parking lot of Starbucks, but he had this big “I’m super happy and nothing will get me down” grin on his face so I cut him some slack and just made kung fu motions behind him while he ordered his coffee.
Speaking of the place that gives me my morning buzz, I got hit on in Starbucks this week. I was not really paying attention to what I was doing while adding cream and sugar to my iced venti Americano and I totally stepped all over the foot of the guy next to me. I apologized semi-profusely. … You think he’s the one who hit on me, don’t you. You’d be wrong. This total Wonder Bread walks up behind me and says something about me being a beautiful woman… and I just said, “ok, then…” because… um, if someone’s gonna get a chance to HIT ON ME in that scenario it should be THE GUY WHOSE FOOT I STEPPED ON. Not the mini-van-of-kids-toting dad and HUSBAND with the dorky owl glasses and the little red ski jacket. Dude, back the fuck off, know when it’s your turn to pounce on the lovelies. And, for the record, I don’t like getting hit on by random strangers, kthxbai. But… um, yah, it happens a lot. I know there’s a lot of single people in the world, but walking up to me and hitting on me doesn’t make me like you. I’m complicated, and I’m not revealing what I do prefer, but just letting you know what I don’t prefer. 
I want Obama to win.
I had gravy for dinner twice this week and I’m pretty sure I’ll be having gravy with dinner tonight. Pork gravy. I keep not practicing the white gravy, which is perhaps a mistake on my part.
Um, not to… remind you about a commercial “holiday” that just exists to generate revenue for merchants, but do you all have Valentine’s Day plans? I have no plans on the actual day other than to flip off anyone who says “Happy Valentine’s Day!” to me. I’m not bitter, I just like flipping people off. Besides, I have plans. Just not on the day. 
Fab posted about me again because apparently I’m just that interesting. I think that one’s really funny, actually. The post yesterday where everyone said they don’t agree with me about the busload of cats? A well thought out post, but reading the comments was like watching someone stick a needle in me so I didn’t.
I kinda wanna play hooky today, for no good reason. If I could find a theater near me that was playing There Will Be Blood I’d be out the door… Maybe I should just go see Cloverfield or Juno again. Or stay home and watch the 6th and final disc of “Freaks and Geeks” which will make me sad that it’s over but happy that I watched it. I’m back up to the maximum number of vacation days again, but I’m going to Tennessee for a week in almost exactly a month, so that’ll take care of that problem. When I say I’m maxed out on vacation days I’m not kidding. Maxed out means I have 42 of them, since I get 21 vacation days per year. (Or do I have 44 because I get 22 per year? Whatever.) I also get sick days and holidays. My employer is very generous.
PiC made me a pie with the Jell-O pudding I gave him from Dawg. I have yet to eat the pie because I am saving it for this weekend when I am willing to take on the project of this pie. It’s a chocolate crust topped with pudding, a layer of crushed Oreos, another layer of pudding, homemade whipped cream, then topped with more crushed Oreos. Did I mention I got to pick it up chez PiC and do hallway game with Nigel then hold Too Legit to Quit while she stared at pretty colors on her mama’s computer screen? I love going to their house. They’re, like, normal and stuff.
My co-worker who was in Iraq has just informed me via IM that he is snowed in but getting a gold tooth at lunchtime today. He’s not kidding. He’s calling it his “pimp daddy” tooth. Can’t wait to see that…
I received a billion CNN Breaking News alert emails overnight, one of which was an actual, legitimate one:
Called my mom to check if she was ok, but no answer. Left a message asking her to call or email, no return call or email yet. On a scale of 1 to 10 I have a tiny nagging worry in the back of my brain, but my mom told me to NOT FREAK OUT EVERY TIME THERE IS A HURRICANE when she lived in Florida so I’m pretty sure that advice carries over to tornadoes in Tennessee.
Update: Mom finally got my voicemail late this afternoon and left me a voicemail that she’s fine.
I think my brain is now sufficiently dumped for today.
Starbucks does seem like the mecca for married men to hit on women. Why is that? Is it just because the caffeine kicks them into overdrive?
NPW, it’s good to know that other lovely ladies get hit on at Starbucks. I don’t believe that analysis, though, only because they haven’t had the chance to actually have their coffee yet. Perhaps it’s the aroma of the coffee coupled with their miserable fucking existence.
I wonder if he’ll let you take a picture of the gold tooth.
I know snow can be a pain to drive in, but I envy you anyway…I wake up every day to another gray, snowless morning.
Keep us posted on your mama…I just talked to my brother in Nashville, he’s OK. Up all night with sirens, but didn’t get hit so that’s good.
Now I want pie - that sounds NUMMEH.
Are these all of your thousand daily posts combined into one?
Bearette, I will attempt to get a photo. I am English, I enjoy the grey.
Tug, no news will be good news. And pie is always a good thing.
Avi, highly doubtful. You know I post like a fiend.
It looks like I need to be in Starbucks more often. Because I um, really want to meet a married guy? I had a date last night in the locally owned coffee place, and it went pretty well.
Today, we had nothing but rain here. But lots and lots of rain. I wouldn’t mind one really big snowstorm and then that would be it for the year.
Now I have to go look up what kthxbai means in the urban dictionary. Why oh why do you do this to me?
Also, if you honestly need some help with making white gravy, I can help you there. Believe it or not, I learned how to make white gravy from the good ole’ grannies out in the country here in Texas….
Abs,
Ok, thanks, bye.
K, thanks, bye.
K, thx, bai.
kthxbai!
Noelle, if you come to my Starbucks I guarantee you a crazy Vietnam Veteran and a nerdy college professor will hit on you.
Abs, as you may have forgotten, Tense is helping me with white gravy. I have a particular recipe I am trying to perfect.
Avi, you’re so helpful lately! What’s wrong with you?
I have a terrible time with white gravy. I’ve given up completely.
Hve you heard from your mom yet?
Trish, I have not heard from my mom yet, no. But I am still not concerned. At the very least my brother would have called to deliver bad news.
Your mom is fine. I always try to be postive no matter what!
We had sirens all night, too, but thankfully that was it.
The Starbucks scenario is funny. I have only been in a Starbucks to retrieve coffee as was my bridemaid duties at the time, but it was enough for me.
Sybil, my mom is either fine or not fine and worrying doesn’t change that. But I really do think someone would have mentioned by now if she were not fine. Besides, she could be not fine for a completely different reason! Starbucks is like its own cosmos…
Clearly, you come from a much less neurotic people than I did… we worry about everything.
Heh, I don’t think I do. I just stopped being neurotic to preserve my sanity.
And I would like to point out that I have never been hit on at Starbucks.
First, I *loved* Cloverfield. Holy crap, that was a good movie. Now I’m drinking the Koolaid you and Dawg had when you saw it.
Second, I second the “way too many cnn breaking news”. My blackberry starts buzzing on all of them due to the filters I put up.
And finally, holy cow, it looks like you’re reading your mail with an actual terminal window! Tell me you’re running biff and I’m yours forever…
Sanity is supposed to be preserved? Shit! I wish someone had told me that earlier.
Huh?
You said:
I keep not practicing the white gravy, which is perhaps a mistake on my part.
I know how to make white gravy. Unless this is code for something and I’m not in on it!
My brother lives 15 minutes from Atkins, Arkansas … he spent last night in his bathroom hiding from tornadoes. He didn’t need the toilet … he’d already peed himself!
Teebopop, it’s not code, I mentioned white gravy in a meme I did on (Monday, I think). Tense has told me her recipe, and I have the intention of trying to perfect my own white gravy, but I keep making brown gravy (from packets) instead. Poor brother.
Let me know how it turns out. I guess I missed your Monday meme (oops).
And stop using those salt infused gravy packets. Yucky!
Teebopop, will do on letting you know how it turns out. I currently cook for one person (myself) so making the meat to create pan drippings is not really so feasible…